Wednesday, April 30, 2014

A Runner's Roundup for April 30, 2014

Someone is building a better running calculator. Here's some running calculation for you: 1 Jumbo Burrito + 1 Long Run = 1 Dehydrated Runner. Fact. (via +Slate)

Runner's World gets ripped a new one for some decidedly un-feminist advice to female runners. It won't be running anywhere for a while. (via My Tights Won't Stay Up)

A heat map of running and bike routes across America. Come on, Wyoming, seriously? Florida is doing better than you. Florida. (via +Strava)

Why running is perfect for geeks. But what about the freaks, +The Guardian? What about the freaks?

Beer mile record broken in the video below. I had never heard of the beer mile before, so I imagined it was drinking a mile of beer, and I wanted to go to there. (via +BuzzFeed)


MORE stuff about hips? How many times can I say it, people? (via +Outside Magazine)



Why I love the marathon. Well, not why I love the marathon, but why Amelia does. I wouldn't say I love the marathon. We're just friends. (via Entirely Amelia)

Tackling the marathon with science. That's weird, I usually like to tackle science with the marathon. But only when I'm not marathon-ing science with my tackle. Gross. (via +Mosaicscience)

Monday, April 28, 2014

The Worst Run Ever

You can't always predict that a run is going to be awful. Seriously. Sometimes, there's no logic to what makes a good or bad run. Some of the best runs I've had have been after I dreaded doing any sort of exercise. I could be hungover, tired, greasy with last night's cheese binge, and congested, but five minutes into the run I'll be humming the Chariots of Fire song and beating my best time.

Although, maybe they were working off a cheese binge as well. I know Mr. Bean was.

On the other hand, runs where I started with ostensibly nothing wrong with me have unfolded badly. Leg-shaking, ragged breathing, blurred vision badly. 

Let's revisit one of those runs.

It was a hot and humid Chicago Saturday morning, about 9 o'clock. At this point, I was probably running about 2-2.5 miles a day.

I felt good. The track/soccer field near the trail head was buzzing with adolescent soccer players. The sun was bright, deepening the very unnatural green of the field's springy AstroTurf. I remembered falling on some AstroTurf when I was a kid and feeling like I was being stuck with a million nails all at once. I didn't envy the kids. 

Pictured: pain incarnate

I started running.

I can't really remember anything distinct about the first part of the run, which isn't surprising. I felt good, and I imagine everything went well at the beginning. Maybe I ran too hard to start. Maybe I underestimated the lateness of the hour contributing to the day's heat. But whatever the reason, somewhere near the end of the first mile, I was feeling something. 

It was indistinct to start. My run felt off, like a T-shirt you accidentally put on inside out. Everything technically fits, but there's pulling and tightness in the wrong places. 

My calves hurt. What? Why do my calves hurt? They haven't hurt since I started. I'm also breathing really heavily. I sound like a pack-a-day smoker after their first flight of stairs. Ugh, my shoulder now? I have this tight pain in my shoulder. Oh good, my neck is getting in on the action. HOW IS MY NECK HURTING TOO?!

System failure happened everywhere. It was like since my running muscles were shutting down, everything else in my body was shutting down out of sympathy. 

I was not happy, but since I now resembled the QWOP runner, I didn't really have the agency to protest.

People were staring.

Then I did something I had literally not allowed myself to do since starting my running journey 3 months earlier: I stopped. I ran off the trail and into the waiting arms of the nearest patch of shaded dirt. I sat for a while, pondering how my breathing still wasn't slowing down, and how I wasn't 100% sure I could move my legs.

But then that lovably indomitable runner's spirit piped up, and its squeaky, earnest voice told me to "Just get up and keep running! Every thing will be A-OK if you just try!"

In the background, a defeated-sounding common sense voice told me that maybe, when the vision is starting to go, you need to STOP and address the problem.

I stood up and shuffled forward into my final half mile, which included a lap around the track/soccer field where I started. Turtles passed me. Thinking I was a statue, birds perched from my barely-moving limbs. Gentle breezes threatened to push me over.

As I circled the track at a glacial pace, many players and parents thought I was a performance piece. Cameras clicked, the game stopped, and I watched my progress from somewhere outside of my body, thinking, This idiot could just start pretending to be a living statue and get some tips out of all this.

Fun fact: this could be a .gif, and you wouldn't even know.

I finished, though it was with the dignity of a drunk dancing for nickels. In fact, the short walk home did resemble the kind of stumble-blurred drunkenness reserved for those nights where whole bottles of things just disappear from your shelves.

That was my worst run ever, and I don't really have a lesson from it. Well, maybe this: it is admirable to continue on through hardship on your runs, but when bodily functions unrelated to running begin to fail, consider calling it a day. Tired leg muscles? Run through it. Out of body experience? Stop.

Friday, April 25, 2014

How to Incorporate Cures for Plantar Fasciitis into Your Everyday Life

It's Friday! You know what that means...


No, not that! Naturally, it means my readers are itching to read about medical cures for common running injuries. (Note: I don't have any cures for actual itches. Go see a doctor, now!)

My name is A Runner's Journal, and I have plantar fasciitis, or PF. There, I've admitted it. The first step is the hardest, right? Well, the first step is usually the hardest with PF. If you wake up and walk around with heel pain, or get heel pain after spending long time on your feet, you might have PF.

While the name sounds like some fanatical Roman dictator, it actually just refers to an injury in the muscles connecting your heel to your toes.

"Et tu, heel pain?" - me, betrayed by my own feet
PF happens for a few reasons, one of which is having high arches. I have high arches. My arches are so high, they served as the model for the arches so integral to Roman-era architecture.

Okay, I officially need to stop with this whole Roman thing.
Anyway. My PF started acting up just after I started running. I researched some cures, found some cures, and have been practicing said cures for the better part of a year now. The cures are straightforward, but I'm busy, and you're busy, and sometimes you can't dedicate much time to preventing PF.

So here's some tips on how to incorporate cures for PF into your everyday life. I'm not saying they'll work for everyone, I'm just saying they worked for me. And before, my arches hurt me worse than the victories of Hannibal hurt the Romans during the second Punic--

Okay, I'll stop! Jeez. Sorry.

1. Freak out your SO by sleeping with a towel all night

The first few steps taken after getting out of bed tend to be the hardest for someone with PF. My theory is that mischievous foot gnomes sneak into my bed and bruise my heels when I sleep. I'm not a doctor though. I'm just an expert on mischievous foot gnomes.

How can you make those first few steps easier? Before standing up, use a towel or something similar to wrap around the ball of your foot and pull the ends toward you, stretching your toes, arch, and calf. This will help alleviate the pain, but it will also require you sleeping with a towel, since standing up to go get one defeats the purpose. For those of us with an SO, this necessitates an awkward conversation about the role towels will play in your sleeping arrangement.

If you sleep alone, this solution actually presents a unique opportunity; feel free to name the towel, maybe give it a personality, and then enjoy late-night talks and early morning cuddles with your new inanimate pal. It's cheaper than a body pillow, right?

Right


2. Ruin the games of others by getting your feet stank everywhere

Massaging your foot also helps cure and prevent PF. But since my personal foot masseuse is on vacation (and my personal hand, head, back, leg, and shoulder masseuses just aren't up to the task), there are other ways of getting a foot massage by using a small ball and rolling it gently under your foot.

Don't have a tennis or baseball handy? No problem! Visit your local park and find a group of people playing tennis or baseball. Wait until the ball gets away from them, sprint towards it with your shoes and socks off, and then rub it on the underside of your foot while moaning softly. Get rid of PF, and make a whole bunch of new friends at the park!

Or jail! Wherever!

3. Melt ice with your feet. Drink water made warm with your feet

If you use the tennis ball approach but don't feel like the massage was ice-numbingly cold enough, you're in luck! Freeze an 8 oz. water bottle, and rub it under foot instead. Not only will you get a cold massage, you get to hear yourself make all sorts of fun noises as a hunk of ice is pressed repeatedly into the underside of your foot.

Then afterwards, you get a drink of water thawed and made lukewarm by your reeking feet! If that isn't a reason to try it, I don't know what is.


4. Hang off of dangerous places by your toes

Of course, there are other ways to stretch your feet besides using your new best friend Towel McTowlington III. Find some steps, and hang the backs of your feet off of them to stretch out your arch and toes.

Not exciting enough? Find other places where this exercise becomes heart-poundingly exhilarating. The edges of a subway platform maybe, In the middle of a crowded staircase during a busy commute. The roof of your house or apartment building. Or stick to steps like some sensible person.


There you have it: four foolproof ways to prevent and cure plantar fasciitis.

Wednesday, April 23, 2014

A Runner's Roundup for April 23, 2014

What's your perfect pre-run meal? I personally prefer a banana. That's one of the many things I have in common with primates. (The other is a tail) (via +Rock Creek Runner)

How to start running again after a long break? Slow and steady is the key. It usually is for most things. Unless there's a fire. Then, fast and frantic work best. (via +Outside Magazine)

East Tennessee man runs double marathon to benefit victims of the Boston Marathon. The last thing I had a double of? Burrito. (via +WVLT Local 8 News)

Simple but effective running techniques! My secret technique? I alternate my feet. That's left then right, left then right. It's working out so far. (via +Running Shoes Guru)

Races in Chicago this May! Go run, Chicago. Go run until you forget how terrible this winter has been. (via +Tracy Swartz)

Some pictures of an ancient running game developed by the world's best long-distance runners. My favorite game to play when running is 'Can I make it home before peeing myself.' I usually win. (via +Imgur)

A place to upload and find race photos! Great idea. Can't even be witty about it. (via +Bib Tagger)

12 things never to do during a marathon. #13: your taxes. Unless you want to be running from the IRS next. (via +Sports Illustrated)

Reddit's weekly running pictures! Runners sometimes run in such pretty places. Yesterday, I ran under a bridge and saw a crow eating a skunk. These pictures are...refreshing, after a thing like that. My favorite below. (via +reddit)

Notice the distinct lack of skunks and crows

Monday, April 21, 2014

A Runner's Meal: Hummus + Anything = Delicious

Happy Monday!

Running and cooking don't always go together as well as you'd hope. Yes, running makes your body crave healthy things, but running also drains some of the energy you need to really put effort into preparing a meal. Sometimes, I find myself just grabbing a loaf of bread and a hunk of cheese for dinner, collapsing on my bed to gnaw at both before passing out, mouth smeared with cheese and bread crumbs.

Just to clarify: I am an adult in the 21st century, not a peasant in the 12th.
But I have that fancy Runner's World Cookbook, and I had time Saturday night, so I decided to make a new recipe. A recipe, I thought, that will require skill, dedication, and commitment. A recipe that will test the limits of my cooking skills.

When the time came, though, I flipped to the "fast meals" section, found the recipe with the shortest list of instructions, and got started. Baby steps, okay?

That recipe was "Roast-Beef Pitas with Cucumber Sauce." I took a look at the instructions. Uh oh. This involved mixing things--it might not be ready in thirty seconds. I began eyeing the bread and cheese beckoning to me from the corner of the kitchen.

Those slightly moldy sirens
But wait. Scanning the instructions, I noticed an ingredient that the authors had inexplicably left out of the recipe's title: hummus. Why leave that out of the title? If I had any recipe that involved hummus, I would title it "Hummus and Whatever, Who Cares, I Could Smear Hummus on an Old Leather Shoe and You Would Still Eat It." And it would be the most popular recipe in the world.

So yeah, I like hummus.

The recipe is for recovery, which means protein in the form of roast beef. The previously-mentioned mixing was Greek yogurt with chopped cucumbers and dill, so not really that hard.


And as I worked to smear the inside of the pitas with hummus, fill them with roast beef, and smother them in the cucumber sauce, I forgot all about the easy meal option of bread and cheese.

That's one of the nice things about making the choice to actually cook. Much like running, once the difficulty of starting is over, it's actually kind of fun and cathartic to put effort into working hard. Although still hungry enough to chug curdled milk, I found satisfaction in filling each pita and arranging it on the plate for myself and my girlfriend.


Then I ate them. I ate them so hard. Much like a horse that has just bolted, I become blind and deaf when tucking into a good meal. It can be challenging to remember the specifics well enough to write about them, but I'll do my best.

Overall, they were very good. The cucumber sauce was cool and light, which is nice since Chicago has finally figured out it's spring and has been getting hotter. The hummus complemented the roast beef even more so than it complements practically anything else, so I was satisfied. And most importantly, the whole recipe only took about 15 minutes start to finish, so I it wasn't too much of a step above bread and cheese time-wise. But it was many steps above taste and health-wise.

I would recommend it in hot weather, but for lunch rather than dinner, since it is a lighter meal. I would also recommend remembering that if you can make yourself run, you can make yourself put effort into a meal. Sometimes it is best to avoid the easy options!

Unless the easy option is hummus. Then you eat the hummus.

Friday, April 18, 2014

Does Running Make You Smarter?

I keep reading things about how running makes you smarter and protects your brain from going to complete mush as you get older. And I don't disagree with that being true or that being a great thing. I love the idea that this habit is good for me mentally as well as physically. In my lifelong plan to become the Batman, I'm really going to need my brain and body in tip-top shape.

I also technically need no parents, but I'm willing to let that requirement slide. You're welcome, mom and dad. 
What I do take issue with is the purpose of articles discussing how running makes you smarter. Here's a question: who are those articles for?

First off, I don't think they provide real motivation for non-runners to become runners. I know facts and figures like that didn't help me at the beginning. Telling someone that they will be smarter in twenty years for something they're doing today does not make today any easier. You have to have a real, tangible, and pretty immediate benefit if you want to make running a habit on a day-to-day basis.

Those big mental benefits are usually long term, so they're like the finish line in the distance. You can't worry about that; you have to watch the path right in front of you and focus on putting one foot in front of the other. Expect nothing from your runs other than that you ran today, and let that be your carrot on a stick. Expect anything else, and you're inviting disappointment.

Actually, you can also expect foot pain. There's going to be some foot pain.
Who else could these articles be aimed at? Current runners, I guess. I bet they're mostly who would be interested in running research, right?

Shut up, Ted.
So why would we be interested in them? I know I must be getting something out of them, since I've featured such articles twice in my weekly roundup.

The more I consider it (with my big, running-powered brain), the more I believe that it's a form of indulgence and self-congratulation. None of us established running as a part of our lives because we wanted to be smarter currently or when we're older. Reading about unexpected mental benefits gained as a side-affect of our physical exercise is like getting two bags of chips from a vending machine when you only paid for one. I'm happy, but I only wanted the one bag. What, am I supposed to eat two bags of chips now?

Pictured: the usual level of difficulty I have eating chips.
Okay, lost that metaphor. But the self-indulgence isn't quite what bothers me, actually. You know what? It's a language issue.

Running isn't about being given things for free. You see an article titled, "Running Makes You Smarter," and you might think running just gave you a Christmas bonus of a shiny, new health benefit. That isn't true to the spirit of the sport. We dig deep for every step, mile, and marathon.

Running doesn't "give" or "make" anything into anything else; running is scraping a block of marble into a work of art with a paperclip, bit by bit, step by step. If you are smarter or faster or more motivated or better organized, it is not because running gave it to you, it is because you are making yourself into a work of art.

So to answer my title: no. You do it yourself.

Wednesday, April 16, 2014

A Runner's Roundup for April 16, 2014

Mo Farrah's weekly training schedule. I could spread one of his average days out over a MONTH and still be tired. (via +Twitter)

The video I wrote about last week. Bananas. (via +BuzzFeed)


Photos from North Korea's marathon. I heard Kim Jong-un won! Of course, I heard it from Kim Jong-un...(via The Wire)

Woman barely jogging. Hey, we all have different...styles of running, okay? Respect. (via +The Onion)

Reddit's weekly running pictures! Like YOUR running pictures, but with other people! (via +reddit)

The benefits of a minimalist running shoe. Minimalism: good for shoes, bad for pants. Cover up, runners! (via Dr. Nick's Running Blog)

A six-year-old is running her own marathon. The only thing I was doing at six was eating too much pudding. I still am at 25, now that I think about it. (via +BBC News)


Monday, April 14, 2014

How To Run in the Rain

Since it's not too cold, I open the window before I go to bed to better hear the sound of falling rain. Who doesn't like that sound when you're warm and cozy in bed?

Not me, that's who
But since I run in the mornings, an open window is a double-edged sword. Waking up to the sound of rain falling when you know you have to go and run makes you feel anything but warm and cozy. It's already hard to get out of bed in the morning, you know?

I stand at the front door, watching ripples appear in the nearest puddle to gauge how hard the rain is coming down. In my mind, a vicious battle rages between the "can" and "can't do" parties. Well, as I've said before, it's less a battle than it is a massacre. The "can't do" party is loud, angry, and creative in how it tears apart the "can" attitude.

But after the carnage ends and the dust settles, "can" is bruised, bleeding, and unmoved. I step out of the front door, and the first rain drops ping off the brim of my hat.

To begin running in the rain, you start running. This first part isn't too different.

Avoid the puddles, watch for cars, and count the seconds in between lightning and thunder. On my run, the seconds in between go from eight to seven. Uh oh.

My skin, already slick from the downpour, shivers as the wind whips and blows the rain sideways. In the rain, a runner is an exposed nerve. You feel everything more. The clothes soaked and shifting on your back, the heaviness of your muscles, the feeling of your stride. You cannot zone out; life is literally throwing cold water into your face.

Pictured: running in the rain
Under the orange light of a rain-streaked streetlight, I see another runner approach. Her head is bowed, shoulders hunched, and feet moving. If she speaks to me as she passes, I cannot hear anything. The nearby river is coughing loudly as it drinks the storm. It, too, cannot stop running.

Because we cannot zone out, runners should love the rain. Because we cannot zone out, there is something liberating about running during a downpour.

Adversity wakes us up to why we started doing this in the first place. Despite the heaviness of my clothes, I increase my pace. Despite the cold dampness of the air, I begin breathing more deeply. This is hard, but that's why I run. This is uncomfortable, but that's why I run.

I pass under a bridge, and suddenly the ground is dry. Suddenly the sound of rain becomes more distant, as if heard through an open bedroom window by half asleep ears. In the shock of this new silence, I manage a chuckle before springing back into the gray curtain of early morning rain, where lightning once again blanches my path.

The rain tapers off as my run does. I reach the front door again, and though I do not know it now, I will know later that this liberated feeling is fleeting. It has to be, or it wouldn't be so magical. The next time I hear rain upon waking, the sinking disappointment will surface again. Running is hard enough, and now I have to do it in the rain?

Then, on that future rainy day, at the end of that run, I will know again what all runners should know. Running in the rain isn't something we have to do, it's something we get to do. That's the second, and last, step: remember that it's an experience uniquely ours.

Friday, April 11, 2014

An Open Letter to the Guy Who Ran 135 Consecutive Miles

Hi Josh,

First off, congratulations! Big accomplishment. 135 miles. 33 straight hours.

Plus, you had to dodge cattle
Other than breathe, I don't think I've ever done any one thing for 32 hours straight, let alone participate in an ultra-marathon. Wait, "ultra" doesn't really cover it. Über marathon? Super duper marathon? What do they call the event, again? The Brazil 135? Well that...doesn't really do it justice, does it? The race isn't short, why should the title be? I think I would call it the "Pre-Foot Reconstructive Surgery" Extreme-Power-Ultra-Über Marathon. Just so people know what they're in for.

But on to my main point: I also want to thank you. Like any good runner, you not only achieved a great personal victory, but you've inspired others and helped put things in perspective. I know you helped me. I am in the thick of things with my spring training, which means I'm running more and more every week trying to build up to 6 miles a day, 36 miles a week. And as you found in your run, the challenge is more psychological than physical.

Since I didn't increase my distance all winter, I got very comfortable with my 3.1 run. I knew exactly what to expect, how much energy I'd be exerting, and where I would be turning around.

Now, though, I'm breaking out of that comfort zone. And I generally have one reaction when I find myself running farther, my muscles and heart straining to cope with the increase in work:


It can be discouraging to have to fight with your brain to find those scraps of motivation on a daily basis, so hearing about your ridiculously epic run helped me to appreciate some of the simple things my relatively lax running schedule allows.

Like sleeping.

I get to sleep in between every one of my runs! Imagine that! I also get to, you know, stop after a while. I use that time not running to do things like eat, write, use the bathroom, all sorts of crazy things.

But you've also inspired me to keep pursuing my training goals so that, one day, I can reach a fraction of your awesomeness. There are so many things you can do after winning that race that I want to try. Here's a few of them.

1. Custom order a "135" running distance bumper sticker, put it on your car, and scorn those with lesser distances displayed on their car.

"Oh, only 26.2 miles? That's cute. I bet you didn't even have to dodge any cattle."
2. One-up literally any thing that is ever said to you. Seriously. You could meet Neil Armstrong and be like, "Oh, you went to the moon? Well, did you run there? No? I BASICALLY DID."

Suck it, you American hero
3. Scare Daniel Day-Lewis from ever playing you in a movie.

Guys, Daniel Day-Lewis is a dedicated actor. We all know this. He gets insanely into every part he plays, even staying in character behind the scenes to try and fully experience who they are.

I heard he went through, like, thousands of stove-pipe hats in preparation for Lincoln
In fact, I'm convinced that his entire career might be preparation for another character who's a really dedicated Hollywood actor with a distinguished career. Basically, I think this whole thing might unfold with Inception-like levels of significance.

But I think we can safely say that you, buddy, are one project he would NOT take on. I think even he would be intimidated by a 135-mile character preparatory run.

So good on you, buddy. I think that's a great accomplishment and a worthy goal for anyone's life: live such that Daniel Day Lewis would find it too hard to play you in a movie.

Nice job.

Sincerely,

A Runner's Journal


Thursday, April 10, 2014

A Runner's Roundup for April 10th, 2014

Sorry this is a day late! It's not a dollar short, though, so that counts for something.

Running slow doesn't matter! Whew. I was worried for a minute. (via +Competitor Group, Inc)

Running protects thinking skills for when you're middle aged! But I can't wait that long! I need smart NOW! (via +BBC News)

More proof that running makes older you smarter. See, if I was middle aged NOW, I wouldn't have posted this same story twice like an idiot. (via +NPR)

Help buy prosthetic limbs for those injured in Boston so they can run again! (via +No Barriers Boston)

An appeal to keep dogs on their leashes for the sake of runners. But he doesn't take in to account that you end up running FASTER when being chased by a doberman. (via Politically Suspect)

What it means to be a runner. For me right now, it means sore feet. True story. (via We Run and Ride)

Explore the London marathon via Google maps! So this counts as me running a marathon, right? I'm going to count it. (via Explore Marathon)

Weekly running pictures! How this thread made me feel: (via +reddit)




Friday, April 4, 2014

A Transcript of Every Motivational Fitness Video You've Ever Seen

You wake up.


The alarm is buzzing, and your body tells you to hit snooze and keep dreaming. But dreams aren't something you have sleeping. They're something you achieve by getting up and stumbling around your room in the dark trying to find your workout clothes.

Okay, I guess people do dream when they're asleep, but sometimes sleep dreams involve scary clowns, and you know what doesn't involve scary clowns? Getting out of bed and running. Unless you run through a circus. Or a Stephen King novel.

WHY DID I WATCH THIS AS A CHILD!?
I'm getting off topic, and someone with a rough, gravelly voice like mine really shouldn't get off topic. You want to hear me say things like, "Sweat is just weakness crying salty tears through your skin because it's being killed by all your hard work." Did you like that? Well too bad, because I'm not going to say that. YOU'RE going to say that while getting drunk on weakness's tears.

So now you're outside and running, but behind you is all the past mistakes that tell you to stop, and they're screaming, "You can't" so loud you can barely hear it over your wearied foot falls and gasped breaths. The voices scream other things too, like, "You were totally the worst at finger painting in preschool," and "Remember being 14, and how terrible you were when you were 14?"

But you ignore them. You're awesome at finger painting now, and your acne has semi-cleared up. Kind of. More importantly, the only thing you can really feel at this moment is the stride of accomplishment as you crest that hill, or the leap of success as you vault a fallen log, or the game of thrones you forgot to watch last night. Damn.

Now I know nothing, Jon Snow!
Your muscles scream in protest as you push them to their limit, but you didn't ask their opinion. You're a tyrannical regime who shuts out the voices of the people to continue exploiting them for personal gain. You metaphorically shoot tear gas into their demonstrations as you maintain your pace up some beautifully huge mountain framed against a rosy sunrise.

Welcome to the eternal struggle of glory against limitation. Okay, you have to pee a little, but you can't do that now as the string quartet swells triumphantly under shots of beautiful people crossing finishing lines slightly glazed in sweat. Meanwhile, you could end drought epidemics with the waves of water rolling of your body and soaking the crusty running shirt you forgot to wash this weekend. Again.

But now you're there. Listen to how the music is swelling behind my voice, which is increasing in pace and volume. You're at the pinnacle of your life so far as you push through all the won't and can't ahead of you through to the other side, which is full of did and finished and suck it. Now you're standing on the hilltop with other champions of superlative human achievement. You're seriously the Abraham Lincoln of runners. Unless, I guess, Abraham Lincoln was actually a runner.

He very well might have been, guys. The man was a national treasure.
But whatever. You're done. You proved you know the value of hard work. Now you have time to reflect on your struggle and success for the rest of the day, as you come down from your endorphin high and watch cheesy motivational videos on YouTube so that you can wake up and do the same tomorrow.

And that's why I love them.

***

Motivation for this post found here:


Wednesday, April 2, 2014

A Runner's Roundup for April 2nd, 2014

Hey, look! A game that uses running to control territory in your neighborhood! Now we can mix gang warfare with fitness! FINALLY. (via +PAN Studio)

How could Happy Gilmore POSSIBLY relate to running? Because it's all in the hips! (via +Runner's World Magazine)


Strength training for runners. I prefer the strength training plan that utilized gamma radiation. That's what comic books have been teasing me with for YEARS. (via +Race 13.1)

A calendar for beer-themed running events. Running and beer go together like beer and LITERALLY ANYTHING ELSE (except driving and calling exes). (via +LetsPour)

A music video by Michelle Lewis highlighting runners. The other music video highlighting runners? Arcade Fire's "We Used to Wait."


Reddit's running pictures thread this week! Always entertaining. (via +reddit)

So this article says don't run too much, cause that might be bad for you. Okay, soapbox: yes, I want everyone to be healthy, but this article uses the same logic as someone who says, "Why do you run and stay healthy? We're all going to die anyway." Hey, listen: I DON'T RUN JUST TO EXTEND MY LIFESPAN, I RUN BECAUSE I LOVE IT AND IT MAKES EVERY DAY BETTER. If you live your whole life focused on the bottom line, you'll be miserable. Fact. (via +The Kansas City Star)